Destination
It takes six of my friends to place me in a car,
My journey begins, I am the passenger.
They drive so slowly!
Half way there, eternity of travel,
A stop off. Six lift me out.
They chat, speak, sing…c’mon, c’mon, hurry up!
It takes six of my friends to place me in a car,
My journey continues, I am the passenger.
They drive so slowly!!
At last we arrive! Six lift me out,
My new home awaits, six lower me down,
The “ashes…” door “dust…” closes.
My journey begins, I am the passenger.
They drive so slowly!
Half way there, eternity of travel,
A stop off. Six lift me out.
They chat, speak, sing…c’mon, c’mon, hurry up!
It takes six of my friends to place me in a car,
My journey continues, I am the passenger.
They drive so slowly!!
At last we arrive! Six lift me out,
My new home awaits, six lower me down,
The “ashes…” door “dust…” closes.
16 comments:
I wasn't expecting that ending, and yet, it's the only one we can all expect! Well written poem.
Chilling. Very well written with an unexpected destination. Bravo!
A very unexpected take on the prompt. Well done, you!
Do you think it will really be that way? "My new home awaits..." I hope so. I hope we are just as eager to get there as we were to stay here!
Amazing take on the topic. The second stanza had me at your final destination. You did not disappoint. Well conceived and well written. Annie
llllovely, can I come too?
Very nicely done.
Wow. I didn't expect that ending. Very creative.
Dark, but I like your flow. I was with you, right from the beginning. Two thoughts; just curious, who are your six friends (pallbearers)?
#2; I'm curious about you being with your friends, at this point. It's interesting to be with them instead of "viewing" them...
Very interesting.
Meg - alas, yes, the six would be the pallbearers, as i only actually have two friends...and i married one of them :)
as for the being with, rather than viewing...it just seemed right, after all a disembodied viewer doesn't have to hang around at their own funery service...hell, i know i wouldn't...dismal affairs - funerals...
Echo - if you wanna go to my funeral, you are very welcome :)
do you mind waiting a few years though? as i'd quite like to watch my daughter grow up...after that, i don't really care.
Very clever. a very unexpected ending. well done
Omigosh, what a great ending! love your poems
Lots of spark for a death poem.
That is quite a destination. Is it safe to say Happy New Year after this?
Nice.
Got me with the ending, there. Brilliant approach.
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